I finished my last semester of my undergrad last December. I can not stress how happy I am that I completed my BA as it had been a long time coming.
But as that chapter came to a close. Another opens. I began to ask myself questions like what to do next with my life? What comes after this achievement? Are all people lost like I am? Or is it just me?
I see my friends are having children, getting married and know what they want to do with there lives and I just don’t. I thought as you grow up you know what steps to take next in life. I thought when I became an adult there was a manual on life. I know after high school it’s college. I did that. What’s after college? More college? How do I begin to live life when I don’t even know what I want to do with my life.
When I look at other educational options all I see is more testing or more money to spend that I don’t have. It’s a major turn off for me. I pride myself on being an example for my siblings. Even though two are older than me and another is younger I refuse to be another statistic. I want to show them that there is other options to life than what we have been exposed to. But when I see all that goes into furthering myself it’s discouraging. I don’t want to do anything with myself. Then I start to feel like a failure. A big fat failure. Ugh why does life have to be so damn on confusing and frustrating.
Can anyone relate to this? I’m 26 and yet so confused more than ever about life. Hopefully I will find some much needed direction soon.