Confess, Faith, Inner Strength, Inspiration, Inspirational blogger, Life, lifestyle, lifestyle blogger

I’m Scared! 

I don’t even know where to begin with this post so I’m just going to start. 

When I was 25 I was diagnosed with AVNRT which is Atrioventricular Nodal Reentry Tachycardia. Which basically means I was born with an extra piece of tissue in my heart and sometimes the electricity in my heart hits it and throws off the heartbeat which causes me to have palpitations, chest pain, tightening of chess and etc. 

When I heard that at 25 I was just like this is can’t be real. I have been healthy my whole life. I first had those symptoms in early November  of 2014 I ended up going to the hospital and they found something totally different. Now that I think about it this diagnosis saved my life. By the time I got to the hospital the symptoms where gone but they found I had a pulmonary embolism on my lung which is a blood clot.    

They ended up treating me for that but two weeks later I’m right back in the ER for the AVNRT. It was pretty scary ordeal. I had people everywhich way. I felt like I was on an epeisode of ER. That was the night they diagnosed me.

 For the past three years I have been dealing with this. It’s been pretty damn scary. Most people might think I’m complaining because other people are way more sicker than me. Which I get but in that moment in my life I was scared. I didn’t know if my heart was going to go out, have a heart attack, or my blood clots came back. I was plain ol’ scared out of my mind. You know what I didn’t tell anybody just kind of put it out of my mind type of thing. When the symptoms came I knew how to stop them until last week. Because now my fear is back. 

Last week I couldn’t stop them those symptoms came back x10. I felt like I was having a heart attack (never had a heart attack) but sure felt like I was dying. 

Now I have to do a procedure where they have to basically cut off that piece of  tissue. It’s an in and out procedure but I’m freaking scared. Anything can go wrong. There’s a possibility they may not find it or a possibility it can be something else entirely. 

I still don’t know why I am writing this post. I guess just to put my fears to blog (hahaha can’t say paper).  I can say I feel better about the whole dang on thing. Still pretty scared but I feel better got my thoughts out. 

Xoxo,

E

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