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I’m Scared! 

I don’t even know where to begin with this post so I’m just going to start. 

When I was 25 I was diagnosed with AVNRT which is Atrioventricular Nodal Reentry Tachycardia. Which basically means I was born with an extra piece of tissue in my heart and sometimes the electricity in my heart hits it and throws off the heartbeat which causes me to have palpitations, chest pain, tightening of chess and etc. 

When I heard that at 25 I was just like this is can’t be real. I have been healthy my whole life. I first had those symptoms in early November  of 2014 I ended up going to the hospital and they found something totally different. Now that I think about it this diagnosis saved my life. By the time I got to the hospital the symptoms where gone but they found I had a pulmonary embolism on my lung which is a blood clot.    

They ended up treating me for that but two weeks later I’m right back in the ER for the AVNRT. It was pretty scary ordeal. I had people everywhich way. I felt like I was on an epeisode of ER. That was the night they diagnosed me.

 For the past three years I have been dealing with this. It’s been pretty damn scary. Most people might think I’m complaining because other people are way more sicker than me. Which I get but in that moment in my life I was scared. I didn’t know if my heart was going to go out, have a heart attack, or my blood clots came back. I was plain ol’ scared out of my mind. You know what I didn’t tell anybody just kind of put it out of my mind type of thing. When the symptoms came I knew how to stop them until last week. Because now my fear is back. 

Last week I couldn’t stop them those symptoms came back x10. I felt like I was having a heart attack (never had a heart attack) but sure felt like I was dying. 

Now I have to do a procedure where they have to basically cut off that piece of  tissue. It’s an in and out procedure but I’m freaking scared. Anything can go wrong. There’s a possibility they may not find it or a possibility it can be something else entirely. 

I still don’t know why I am writing this post. I guess just to put my fears to blog (hahaha can’t say paper).  I can say I feel better about the whole dang on thing. Still pretty scared but I feel better got my thoughts out. 

Xoxo,

E

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There Will Be Days 


Some days it’s going to pour. Some days it won’t. 

Life is made up of these days. I’m testament to this. I have experienced some of the worst days of my life. Let me tell you on those days it definitely poured. I didn’t know how to get my life back on track. I prayed and asked god to guide me. 

I’m standing here in Gods grace as I type this post to you. My life is not perfect but it’s not what it use to be. 

My point of this post is to know that when it rains just know that god has plans for beautiful flowers to grow. You may doubt him and become angry with him but know your life is going to be okay.   

Always, 

E

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Forgiveness 

Morning💜, 

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. 

It’s the last week of the year. As you know this month has been about self-care for me. This week I’m practicing forgiveness. I’m forgiving others so my spirit can be at peace. 

Over the last week I have been spending more time with my family since my aunt is visiting from North Carolina. What stood out to me the most was seeing my mom bring up things from almost twenty years ago. I had to tell my mom to let it go. Your blaming my aunt for something she had no control over. Let it go. Forgive my grandmother for what happened and move on. That hurt and pain you have been carrying for way too long. Give your heart peace. 

 For all those who hurt me and wronged me I forgive you. I wish you nothing but the best in life. 

This week I want to inspire  you to forgive those who have wronged you and move on with your life. Leave the pain and the hurt in 2016. Walk into 2017 with forgiveness in your heart. 

XoXo, 

E

ps, 

forgiveness is not about letting someone off the hook for there actions, but freeing ourselves of negative energies that bind us to them.  

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Don’t You Worry!! 

Morning loves,

If your anything like me your always worrying about tomorrow. My advice to you, DON’T. This quote somes it all up perfectly. What’s coming will come. Don’t worry about it. Everything will fall into place. Live your life in the meantime. Tackle everything as it comes. 

Hope your practicing self-care this month and just honoring thy self💜.

-E

ps, 

Let go and let God. 

 

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Grace🙏🏾

Morning! 

I hope this quote inspires you today. I hope it reminds you that you have been through hell but your still standing. I hope your day is full but nothing but amazing things. Have a wonderful day. 

xoxo, 

Ebony Monae😘

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Deeply Saddened yet Deeply Moved

Good morning guys. Its been a while since I have written. To be honest I have been going some mild depression. I am managing my depression now with the help of my therapist and psychiatrist so I’m on a road to recovery to being my best self I can be, but that will be a story for another day.

Today I want to talk about how shocked I am about what happened on Tuesday. I still am in shock. I am angered by the pure hatred I have seen on social media. On top of that I am overwhelmed by the amount 0f love and support I have also seen.

Tuesday I had to unfriend a few people on my social media accounts. They were people who I knew from my childhood. One thing I learned from Tuesday was that who you thought you knew, you really didn’t know that well after all. On Tuesday I learned that racism, discrimination, misogyny, homophobia were not deal breakers for people. I also saw humanity at its best. 

People have told me that I should just get over it Trump won. People told me that its just four years.  One thing I won’t be is SILENT. One thing I have learned is that Silence = Compliance. I am not silent about the things that matter to me. I won’t stay quiet when racism is running rampant. I have friends and family of different faiths, sexual orientations and creeds. I will fight for them. I will help take downs walls that people have built and if in that four years I have children I will raise them to do the same.

EbonY Monae

ps, 

I don’t mind differnces of opinions but, I do mind hate. 

                        -Anonymous

 

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Always💖

Morning Sunshines☀️

I hope you have a amazing day. Going forth today I want you to remember that You Matter. 

Don’t forget that You Will Always Matter. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t.  Don’t let anyone ever tell you differently. 

This is your amazing, vibrant, and beautiful life that matters. This is your life and I want to inspire you to live it beautifully

Ebony Monae 💜
ps, 

You Will Always Matter💜 

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Grace💖


Good Morning. I hope your Monday is off to an amazing start. 

Ohh before I begin. Let’s celebrate Indigenous People Day!! 

Today I want you to choose grace. I want you to choose kindness and love. Life is hard and people are cruel but we don’t have to be like others. We can choose Grace like god gives us Grace. So choose GRACE💖

✨Ebony Monae✨

ps, 

She has fire in her soul 

And

Grace in her Heart💖

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Inspiring the Uninspired 

Someone asked me why I do what I do? This qoute above is why. It defines everything I want to do with my life. I want to inspire someone to live life as beautifully as they want to. I never want to see someone give up on life. 

 I’m a testament to that.  A couple of years ago my life was empty. I was on the brink of giving up. I couldn’t take anymore. My life was in shambles but at the end of that dark tunnel I saw light. 

It was a long road. One that I am still embarking on. My life ain’t rainbows and giggles but everyday I make an effort to work on myself. 

Today I encourage you to live life beautifully. Take the next step in life.

 As always; Be Beatuiful. Be Amazing. Be Vibrant.  

Ebony Monae💜 

ps, 

Believe in yourself and you will be unstoppable 

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Write It! 

Write your own story. It’s your life. Write it beautifully. Cross out moments you don’t like. Highlight the moments you do like. 

 I inspire you to write it. Your life is a wonderful story that’s waiting to be told. So tell the story. 

Be Amazing, Be Beautiful, Be Vibrant. 

Ebony Monae, 

ps, 

Do what makes your heart beat faster💖